I finished For One More Day today, and this is what I thought: Who do I want to spend one more day with? Well, first of all, this person would have to be on the other side already, so I thought about it and I think I would pick Grandma Martinez. There is one thing that I regret about her. When I was 7 or 8, she gave me this beautiful doll dressed in a handmade gold gown. She had blond hair. I kept her nice and clean. I hardly played with her. When we were going through our things at the home site after we'd moved a few times, Dad emptied a bag of dolls and stuffed animals. Out she fell with some other stuffed animals I remember. I kept the unicorn Dad gave me for Valentine's one year and since I hardly played with the doll, I told Dad he could give it away. I wish I kept it. I want to be as close to Grandma Martinez as I am with Grandma Brown. But the funny thing is, Grandma M speaks English and I hardly knew her, and Grandma doesn't and yet I'm closest to her. There are so many questions I would ask her and Grandma. And if for nothing else, I liked this book because it made me think of my loved ones who have passed on. One in particular. There is a broach that Grandma B gave me when I was little. I thought I lost it once. I tore my house apart looking for it. You can't imagine how happy I was when I found it! I was so relieved that I could pass it down to Athen.
As a parent, I know parents make mistakes. I try hard to be a good parent, on most days more than others. Sometimes I am so clueless and feel like I have no answers. And as a child, I can't imagine the many moments I've missed because of pride or embarrassment, moments I could have made better choices, kissed my parents, hung out with brothers. I guess you just do what you do in the moment and hardly anyone thinks of the consequences. I hope to savor more and try harder. I keep saying these things but I'll really try. I finished the book didn't I? That's a start.
1 comment:
I think that is the biggest reason for journals. Sometimes, I know I do this, we try to think of the perfect moment that we need to put down on paper. Sometimes we just need to write down things. Later go back and make other entries or additions. I've tried to get back to my journal. Later on you'll understand that writing simple entries are worth a thousand words to a reader. I to sometimes wish I had more moments with those who have passed on but I'm trying to leave a legacy of my own by doing the right things and living the gospel.
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